NHS Heroes: Jason and the Lab Reports

Jason / attracts the attention / of one of the hospital pathology lab technicians / by jabbing her with the point of his spear / Over here! / he snaps / process these before I collapse / and saying thus he deposits / a bunch of specimens from his toga pockets / CRP and FBC / from the bronze giant Thalos on Crete / U’s and E’s / please / for King Aetees / LFT, TFT and Bone Profile / for the hideous and horribly motile / skeleton army / I fought and diced like calamari / and… and culture & sensitivity for the swab / I took from the gaping, golden gob / of the ram’s skull yet appending / the Golden Fleece at my journey’s ending /… but just at that moment the door blows wide / and a helmeted Hercules thunders inside / his leather trousered legs spread wide / transfusion panniers swinging at his side / Zeus and Hera! The day I’ve had! / Take these offerings before I go mad!