I’m blushing
it’s embarrassing
to admit this
but these days when I piss
at a public urinal
to encourage the flow’s eventual arrival
I have to make clicking noises like the Predator
which makes people turn to look, but – whatever
I mean sure – I could probably learn something better
like When Love Takes Over by David Guetta
which would still be odd but not so dramatic
and make my life less traumatic

but there you are – I’m just an average bloke
with a prostate and invisibility cloak