B road movie

it’s early morning
and I’m driving to work
north along the A272
if you must know
following an old van
with a laughing monkey decal on its back

I think about it for a while
at least until we get to the roundabout

how maybe this van appears now and again
driving around with a monkey on its back
and if you fall in behind it
you crash
and the last thing you see
through the flames
is the laughing monkey

the police inspect the road
apply the local highway code
look at the brakes
think about possible driving mistakes
take witness statements
call in expert traffic agents

in short
they scratch their heads and stamp the report
unaware of the truly terrifying terror
of the old van haunting B roads forever
with a monkey sticking its tongue out in a mirror
where YOU’RE the mirror
and you scream and shiver
and haul on the wheel
and the tyres squeal
and you end up fatally ploughed in a field
with your head cracked open and your brains running out
for the raucous crows all flapping about

just an idea
sorry – I have to turn off here

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