where were you when Kennedy got shot
when they laid the first stones at Angkor Wat
when Hendrix played the Star Spangled Banner
when they wheeled the Kitty Hawk outta the hangar
when Jesus Christ got nailed to a cross
when a model agent discovered Kate Moss
when Einstein worked as a patent clerk
when Robert Shaw got eaten by a shark
when Sgt Pepper got designed by Blake
when Lisbon got wiped out by a quake
when Darwin wrote the Origin of the Species
when Marie Curie wrote her radioactive theses
when Neil Armstrong put boots on the moon
when soldiers entered the Paris commune
when Krakatoa blew its top
when Lady Jane Grey knelt down for the chop
when Fleming checked a petri dish
when Charlie Chaplin met Lillian Gish
when Genghis Khan united Mongolia
when Virginia Woolf wrote books in Fitzrovia
when the Titanic hit an iceberg and sank
when quantum theory got written by Planck
when plague stalked Europe in the fourteenth century
when Capone did time in Alcatraz penitentiary
hmm?
you just sit there, ordering juices
dreaming up lots of lame excuses
poems
film score tropes
a drone pulls back to city-wide height
from a phallic, floodlit monument at night
while some gravelly gravitas voiceover guy
slowly explains the reasons why
the system stinks but whaddya do
except call on the services of you-know-who
= NOBLE HORNS
the wind blows softly through the pines
as shadows play across the blinds
a barefoot woman walks downstairs
to find out why the cat sounds scared
she nuzzles his head, stretches, yawns
doesn’t see the figure out on the lawn
= ORCHESTRAL DUMP
the jumpy night clerk signs you in
with a nervous tic and a dead-eyed grin
when he turns to fetch the key off the hook
you quickly glance at the visitor’s book
and suddenly there is no doubt
the day she stayed? he’s ripped it out
= GLISSANDO VIOLINS
you’re walking back from a Halloween party
thrown by college friends Claire n’Marty
now it’s spooky, wet and dark
and you really shoulda skirted the children’s park
you pick up your pace, speed dial Claire
‘cos you see a swing swinging but there’s no one there
= CHILDREN SINGING A NURSERY RHYME
greek trauma
Jason and the Argonauts
succumbed to darker thoughts
Theseus found the Minotaur
but also a minor flaw
despite all the selfies & martial displays
he actually preferred getting lost in the maze
Prometheus
was queasiest
thought life with a liver-ripping eagle was easiest
Persephone
helplessly
dodging her dodgy family endlessly
picked at her food, flip flopped restlessly
six months Hades, six months Thessaly
King Midas
wise ass
everyone giving his high fives a hard pass
easy touch, gastric band
swapped his friends for krugerrands
and Icarus?
bored, basically sick of us
his dad plain mad, the rest ridiculous
full of wax and feathery spunk
spread his wings, aired his junk
but it didn’t work out and his dream got sunk
existential nursery rhyme
Susan snoozing in her bed
soon she’ll be up and toasting bread
Nietzsche and a low fat spread
tea and existential dread
it’s a void
it’s a void
all our plans will be destroyed
nothing before, nothing after
infinity with a twist of laughter
Brian crying quietly
smoothies and sobriety
doodles skulls in his diary
Sunday night anxiety
it’s a void
it’s a void
all our plans will be destroyed
nothing before, nothing after
infinity with a twist of laughter
(and so on, ad infinitum)
Instawar
vapes of grape, lemonade ice / the army’s hitting town tonight / for bougie selfies, TikTok shorts / a derelict house and a blurry corpse
the war will be sponsored by Apple and Coke / with well-placed cans while you shoot the folk / who queue for bread and wave the flags / and splash their blood on shopping bags
Starbucks, Costa, Burger King, Wendy / everything quick-bite, media-friendly / it’s all about likes at the end of the day / is that to die-in or drag away?
a visionary tactic, cash or plastic / hospitals burn but look fantastic / pass the scope I’m a hit dispenser / a stone cold, five-star influencer
so like for more and scroll for kicks / drones & tanks & fighting ships / you love this bullshit, why deny it / you made your bed now cry in it
blue fish
niece Rose was arguing
with someone on the phone
I walked in the kitchen
and set my rucksack down
Richenza was sitting
she seemed a little blank
watching blue fish swimming
around a bubbling tank
I said hello and sat
I watched the blue fish too
Rose waved as if to say
she was just about through
Richenza suddenly
shivered and turned to me:
‘I was safe in my mother’s belly’
she said
when I travelled across the sea’
‘Sorry! Sorry!’ blushed Rose
‘Not anything for months
But that’s the way life goes
I suppose
Everything all at once’
flipchart
allow me to explain
(any questions, speak up)
and I’ll write in nice big crayon
so you losers gotta chance to keep up
this is YOU…and this – is – your stoopid HAIR
and this is the military-industrial complex sitting over there
okay… SO – these are serious guys
they sell a lotta shit
and they’re big on toys that make some noise
approved by government scientists
bombs, boats, planes – you name it
a trillion dollars n’cents
and there’s absolutely no shame in it
cos everyone need defence
it’s all perfectly legal
maps with lines n’borders
and it needs a ton a’people
to satisfy the orders
I know what your thinkin’
all we are saying is give peace a chance
yeah well thank you mr lennon
but flowers don’t fund no power plants
the 100% real-world facts are
you don’t really have a choice
you’re like – chickens in an abattoir
squawkin’ in one voice
sure – the system’s unsatisfactory
but everyone’s gotta go through it
from hatchery to factory
relax my friends, just do it
it’s a bougie little pumpkin patch
everyone’s ahead
well – sorry – awks – not you, natch
you’ll most likely be dead
then after the last big shootin’ show
when all the planet’s bust
and everything’s brown and nothing grows
on Earth’s burned pizza crust
the last few humans to exist
buried in their lairs
are a handful of heavy industrialists
a coupla big tech billionaires
evolved into bug like creatures
waving antennae wide
to scout for recognisable features
before they crawl outside
they’ll scuttle up to wipe their faces
stretch after a nice long sleep
buff their carapaces
finally king of the heap











